Monday, January 12, 2015

Film Review: Blood Valley: Seed's Revenge (aka Seed 2) (2014)

Blood Valley: Seeds Revenge (aka Seed 2) (Review)
United States/Germany/2014
Format Viewed For Review: Netflix Instant
Netflix Streaming: Yes
Amazon Prime: No

" of the worst films I've ever reviewed..."

A group of friends returning from a bachelorette party in Vegas cross paths with a psychopathic killer in the desert.

Blood Valley: Seeds Revenge is a film that is unnecessarily told in non-chronological order -- it jumps from scene to scene for no apparent reason. So, let me tell you what happens in chronological order. A group of friends returning from Vegas run into a hitchhiker -- he has little relevance in the story. Then, they run into a seemingly stranded cop. Their vehicle conveniently breaks down, so the cop orders two of the girls to walk with her to the nearest town -- the other two girls stay in the RV. Meanwhile, Seed (Nick Principe), our serial killer, kills the women. The ending, like the rest of the film, was terrible.

Blood Valley: Seeds Revenge is a mess. The storytelling is unnecessarily convoluted. It leaps from past to future, back to the present (I think), and so on and so forth. Even without the terrible attempts at clever storytelling, the film is a complete mess. The story is very sloppy. I don't even know if there was a point to this massacre. Something about meeting their savior, I think. How? I guess... By killing people? That's all they really do, kill people and occasionally read from the bible. It doesn't explain anything to the audience, so you're left wondering most of the time, especially during the ending.

Without an actual story, you're left with hollow characters and a gratuitous amount of violence and torture. The characters have no depth, I can't even remember their names and I watched the entire film. And, like I said, the "story" is all over the place. Furthermore, unless you find poorly-edited scenes of torture frightening, you won't find a shred of horror in this film. Violence? Sure. Horror? Nope. This film has no suspense or dread, which is disappointing considering the setting. Sure, it's been done before in The Hills Have Eyes, but it should still be capable of conjuring some horror. Otherwise, a horror movie without horror is a waste of time.

The film doesn't fair any better when it comes to the acting -- it's terrible! I watched a film called The Ouija Experiment prior to this and I thought that film had bad acting. Well, Seed 2 makes the acting in The Ouija Experiment look... good -- that's saying something. Okay Nick Principe, who plays Seed, was at least decent. Otherwise, it was bad. It's partly due to the unnatural dialogue, I have no idea if it was actually written or improvised. Back to the storytelling, the editing is atrocious. Even without the storytelling issues, the editing is bad. Who's idea was it to cycle between two scenes over and over as fast as possible?

The practical special effects were decent, though. There isn't any gore in this film that will blow your mind, but it's at least decent. This film is written and directed by Marcel Walz. Somehow, Marcel Walz managed to do worse than Uwe Boll. Although I personally liked Rampage: Capital Punishment, Assault on Wall Street, and Darfur a bit, Uwe Boll has made some terrible films in the past. Blood Valley: Seeds Revenge is akin to the Alone in the Dark's and House of the Dead's of Uwe Boll's past -- it's that bad, and Marcel Walz writing and direction is partly responsible.

Overall, Blood Valley: Seeds Revenge is a terrible horror film. The story is bad, the storytelling and editing are terrible, most of the acting is horrid, and the horror is nonexistent. It's one of the worst films I've ever reviewed on this website. I hardly ever give a score this low, but it's warranted for this film. I thought the original Seed was at least passable, this sequel isn't recommended in the slightest.  Also, the poster/cover of this film actually looks decent -- you have a menacing Seed with an axe and a woman with a ripped shirt and deep cleavage yelling at the sky... Too bad none of that happens, I don't remember an axe or the yelling to the sky. Might as well add some helicopters, a SWAT team, and some explosions to the background...

Score: 1/10
Parental Guide: Graphic violence and gore, including sexual violence, and some nudity.

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